Yesterday it reached 50 degrees and I decided to take the opportunity to get out for an overdue “run”. It has been awhile. I’ve exercised but not run for a couple of weeks at least. Wow, I could tell. Breathing was harder and I had to do more intervals than the last time I had run. I managed to keep my time on pace but barely. While I was running (which is really just a fast walk) I was discussing with God on how to handle the next bit of time in my life. I have taken one class for Biblical Counseling and loved it. The next one starts again next week. I have already skipped it once as we were anticipating a new adventure starting for Mark this month. While this adventure is for Mark it will involve both of us. We’re a team you know! Turns out it is not going to start until April 1st but there is preparation to be done between now and then. My classes last 5 weeks a piece. Perfect window of opportunity to get one more done before the new adventure officially begins…but I was dragging my feet.
Towards the end of my run I saw an elderly gentleman out for a walk. He was using a cane and his head was down. You’ve seen elderly people like this before. Their spine is curved and it takes great effort to straighten out. Just behind him ran up a young child with his mother following. The child was full of energy and dancing circles enjoying the fresh air. The gentleman did not see the child until he was almost literally under his nose. I got to see the whole scene. All of the sudden the debate in my head stopped. I don’t want to get so busy that I have to “keep my head down watching only my path”. I want to be able to watch and see what God is doing in my husband’s life at the start of this new adventure. I want to take in what He has for me. I don’t want people to have to walk into my path and say hey, I’m here look at me. Yes, it means delaying my classes for a bit but that’s okay. I’m married. I’m a part of a team and our team has a new game. I intend to be fully “there.”
What about you? Do you have so much going on in your life that you are only minimally involved in your spouse’s life? Don’t get me wrong. We each have and should have things that are ours as individuals. Mark bowls. I read or scrapbook. But if I add so many things at once into my life that I have to “keep my head down” – allocating every moment to be sure that everything gets done. I don’t get to look around and enjoy what is going on all around me. I’m choosing to set a boundary right now. I will limit new things to fully live in the current things. It’s a trust issue with me. I have to trust that God can and will speak to me, use me and grow me even without a formal “class.” I have to trust that my husband will support me when it is time for me to return to those studies. Hmmm, there’s a growing experience right there.