Valentine’s Day is upon us. You would have to be blind to not know this. There are hearts, chocolates, flowers and the color red everywhere! As always, this brings to mind love and romance. Knowing I had this article to write I asked my husband, Mark, what his idea of romance was. In the interest of full disclosure my husband is the true “romantic” person in our relationship. With that in mind his answer truly surprised me, at least until I thought about it awhile. He said he wanted to know that he was “the man” in my life. That he is special to me and that I respect him, value his thoughts and work. I bet that answer is not what you expectedto hear first either. Culturally we’ve characterized men in general to be self-centered and focused on sex. We’ve really done ourselves a disservice by thinking that way. The truth is men are people just like us (women) who have a deep desire to be loved and appreciated for who they are.
I’ve been thinking about this for a couple of weeks now and two things have stuck in my mind. Things I desperately needed to be reminded of:
1.) I am a special treasure to God. So are you. So is the man in your life. If you have known me long you have heard me say this. It’s based on scripture as a whole. Strong’s Concordance #5459 says the word “special” in Deuteronomy 26:18 means “Possession, personal property, special treasure. This noun occurs eight times in the Old Testament…Man’s treasure is material objects, but consistently in Scripture, God’s treasure is human beings.” Not only does God “treasure” me but He “treasures” my husband as well. Part of my role as his wife is to help him understand that. I can do that simply by paying attention to him, actively listening to him and supporting and praying for him. At the IF: Gathering this past weekend one of the speakers encouraged us to tell our husbands that we see the men of God they are becoming. I love that! I love it when Mark acknowledges some growth in me. It only makes sense he would feel the same encouragement. It shows I’m paying attention to him. This isn’t rocket science. It’s actually pretty simple. Let him know you love him and only him..
2.) My second thought is not quite as easy to define. While on a recent beach vacation, the Lord reminded me that part of loving and respecting my husband was for me to take care of myself and look my best for him. While sunbathing I had the opportunity to observe women in modest and not so modest attire. As I watched these women work so hard on getting the perfect tans, my “Christian” values regarding vanity and immodesty rose to a judgmental level. Then, I received what felt like a gentle but firm scolding from the Lord. Even though, some of these women were “out of line” in my opinion concerning their attire, they were trying to look their best. The Lord reminded that instead of judging others on what they were or were not wearing, He wanted me to look at myself and ask the question, am I making every possible effort to be and look my best for Mark.
Because we do see so much immodesty in our world today it’s easy for us as Christian women to focus on what we shouldn’t do. However, that does not mean we should ignore our bodies, or doing whatever we can do to look your best. Our husbands live in this world daily. We ask them to protect their eyes. We put protective programs on our computers and turn off the TV shows that are not respectful but what do we do, personally to keep them filled up at home?
This Valentine’s Day why don’t you give your husband, fiancée’ or boyfriend the gift only you can give, the gift of knowing that he is a special treasure to God and to you …packaged in an extra effort of your best for him.