Today I was reading in Mark 9. You might know the story. There is a man who’s son has been demon-possessed “since childhood.” First it struck me how full of love and hurt for his son that father probably was. He was probably desperate. He was willing to take his mute son who had seizure-like episodes into public and been seen and probably talked about if it meant possible healing. So he took his son to the disciples, as Jesus was on the mountain with Peter, James and John, but they couldn’t heal him. An argument ensued. And when Jesus asked what was going on the father of the boy spoke up and told of his son’s plight. Again, I’m struck by the father’s determination to try to get help for his son, no matter what. The disciples had already failed to heal him and the situation had turned into a public spectacle. The father finishes his summary of the child’s problem with “But if you can do anything, take pity on us an help us.” (Mark 9:22b NIV) Then this well known conversation takes place. “If you can?” said Jesus. “everything is possible for him who believes.” Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me over come my unbelief!” (Vs. 23-24)
“I do believe, help my unbelief.” I know just what he meant. I believe God is all-powerful, able to do anything and knows everything. Yet, I fuss and stew over the most “daily” of things. How will I ever get all my housework done and have food ready for company? Will I every be able to stick with an exercise routine? And of course there are the more “important” things. How can/should I be helping my dad take care of my mom with Alzheimer’s? Or will Mark’s injured knees allow him to do his job? That “fussing” is a sign. A sign of my deep down belief that God, the God of the universe really cares about me enough to handle my every day situations, enough to handle me.
The truth is, He does and He can.
My prayers have changed recently. When I talk to God now I continue to tell Him everything but I very sincerely add, “I believe Lord, help my unbelief.” In this honest confession the Lord is helping me to grow in my faith. It’s mind boggling. I can’t even believe without His help!