It’s Okay to Stand in Need

Standing in the Need of Prayer

I remember going forward for prayer at the altar at church one Sunday. I was in my late 20s. This particular morning came on the heels of several months of devastating life circumstances. Not only did my husband lose his job after several years and rounds of layoffs, but that came on the heels of him being fired from another job. A church job. This had resulted in some devastating broken relationships. Much of these tensions were completely out of my control.

Going forward at church that morning, I felt so broken. So alone. So beyond help. I couldn’t stop the tears. They were uncontrollable. This was my first time going forward to the altar for my own need. I remembered standing there, knowing what it felt like to be whole and happy and trusting God when things were going well. This wasn’t it.

That was part of the problem. I was equating my former happiness with closeness to God. Or at the very least, I was equating my happiness with wholeness. This despair and brokenness was something entirely unfamiliar to me. I wondered if I would ever come out of these experiences standing; in one whole piece, or if I’d just remain a shell of a person for the rest of my life.

It was essentially my first time being the spiritually and emotionally needy one. I was screwed up. There were no easy answers to my problems. I couldn’t make them go away. I couldn’t faith it til I made it.

Since that day about 15 years ago, what I’ve learned that I didn’t know then, is that it’s OK to stand in need. It was my un-neediness that left me stuck where I was. Doing church. Enjoying people. But not trusting, going deeper, changing, or perhaps even believing. I was believing in a god of my own making. Because I was a Christian and had a good life, I just figured I was righteous. This new experience brought me face to face with my need and my inability to change things. And face to face with the most painful truth to someone who is controlled and proud: that I can’t order my world.

I was confronted with a need for God. And to me, that felt like failure. But I was so wrong. Needing God isn’t failure, it’s just the beginning. My mindset has since done a 180.

In fact, I want to regularly recognize my need. If I haven’t gone forward in church to the altar in quite a long time, I want to check my heart. Am I disconnected from my need for God? Why is that? Is there pride creeping in? What have I been beholding in my life? Have I been talking to God? What can I do to change my callousness?

Let’s not be a people embarrassed to run to the altar in need. Let’s not hide our brokenness from others. Let’s be honest and true and not be ashamed of wherever it is we are in our walk with the Lord. Let’s own who we are, where we are. If we want more of God, we should be willing to deny ourselves over and over again. We should want all that God has for us. If you don’t want all that He has for you, perhaps You need to get to know Him better to see just how good He is.

As I was thinking about all of this, an old spiritual came to mind called Standing in the Need of Prayer.

Not my brother, not my sister, but it’s me, O Lord,
Standin’ in the need of prayer;
Not my brother, not my sister, but it’s me, O Lord,
Standin’ in the need of prayer.

It’s me, it’s me, it’s me O Lord,
Standin’ in the need of prayer;
It’s me, it’s me, it’s me O Lord,
Standin’ in the need of prayer.

Isaiah 40:29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

We spend an awful lot of time discussing all the people in our community in need of God. The gay youth, the pregnant single college student, or the neighbor who is strung out on drugs more often than he’s not. I really think we should spend more time talking about how much we need Him. How much I need Him. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather admit my need, ask for and receive the Lord’s perfect strength than to depend on my own strength that will never be enough. My righteousness is filthy rags. (Is. 64:6) But He will make [my] righteousness shine like the dawn. (Ps. 37:6). That’s a pretty amazing exchange.

Mark 2:17 When Jesus heard this, he told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor – sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.“

I’ll end with the beautiful lyrics to a song by Caroline Cobb:

Only the sick need a physician

Who is this man who sits with the sinners
Who dines with the drunkards and loves the unclean
Oh, who is this man who won’t cast a stone
But honors the harlot who washes His feet
Sayin’…

[Chorus]
Come, scarlet letters
You outcasts and debtors
I will call you my friends
I’ll sit at your table
You broken and fatal
Only the sick need a physician
Oo-oo-oo-ooh, oo-oo-oooo-oooh

[Verse 2]
Who is this man who calls God a father
The son of a blue-collar carpenter man
Who calls us unclean, like tombs full of bones
We keep our religion but whitewash our sin
Sayin’, “Be born again”

[Chorus]
Come, scarlet letters
You outcasts and debtors
I will call you my friends
I’ll sit at your table
You broken and fatal
Only the sick need a physician
Oo-oo-oo-ooh, oo-oo-oooo-oooh

What kind of God would hang on a tree
Mocked and rejected
And nailed to the word
You saved all the others, but can’t save yourself?
We don’t need a savior, we are well and we are good
And your nail to the wood…
We never understood
There is a none who is good…so

[Chorus]
Come, scarlet letters
You outcasts and debtors
I will call you my friends
I’ll sit at your table
You broken and fatal
Only the sick need a physician
Oo-oo-oo-ooh, oo-oo-oooo-oooh

– By Vonda Sellers